What Not To Say To A Lawyer? Jeremy Eveland

16 min readAug 5, 2024

Jeremy Eveland 8833 S Redwood Road West Jordan Utah 84088 (801) 613–1472

What Not To Say To A Lawyer: Common Missteps to Avoid

When seeking legal advice or representation, communication plays a pivotal role in building a successful relationship with your lawyer. However, there are certain phrases and statements that can hinder understanding and respect. Knowing what not to say can significantly improve your interactions with a lawyer. Here are some common missteps to avoid when communicating with legal professionals.

1. “I don’t need a lawyer to handle this.”

While you might feel confident in your ability to manage a legal matter on your own, dismissing the importance of legal counsel can backfire. Lawyers bring years of training and experience that can guide you through complex legal territory. Instead, express your concerns and discuss how they might help you navigate the situation.

2. “Can you get me out of this?”

This phrase can come off as unrealistic or demanding. Legal matters often require a nuanced approach rather than a quick fix. Instead, ask your lawyer about possible strategies and their likelihood of success. This invites a productive conversation instead of establishing a tone of entitlement.

3. “I want everything to go my way.”

Entitlement can lead to disappointment. Legal processes involve compromise and negotiation. Instead, focus on your goals and discuss how you can collaborate with your lawyer to work towards a resolution that meets your needs. This is more likely to foster trust and cooperation.

4. “I read this online. Isn’t that how it works?”

While online information can be helpful, it often lacks context and can lead to misunderstandings. Relying solely on your own research may seem like a good idea. However, it’s better to ask your lawyer for clarification on what you’ve read. This shows respect for their expertise while allowing them to provide insights applicable to your specific case.

5. “This shouldn’t take long.”

Legal matters can be unpredictable and timelines can vary greatly. By assuming that a case will be resolved quickly, you may set unrealistic expectations. Instead, ask your lawyer for an estimated timeline while acknowledging that complexities may arise as the case progresses. This makes for a more transparent discussion.

6. “I don’t have time for this.”

Phrases like this can undermine the seriousness of your legal situation. Every aspect of your case is important, and expressing impatience can reflect poorly on your commitment. Instead, if you feel pressed for time, explain your schedule and see if the lawyer can accommodate. Good lawyers will appreciate your communication and may help find solutions together.

7. “You cost too much.”

Discussing fees can be uncomfortable, but criticizing a lawyer’s rates right off the bat might close the door on important conversations. If budget is a concern, it’s better to directly address it and discuss alternative payment plans or options rather than dismissing their worth outright.

8. “I’ve got a great idea for my case.”

While client input is valuable, implying that you know better than your attorney can create friction. Lawyers are trained to navigate the legal landscape, so instead of dictating terms, present your ideas as suggestions. Ask for their input and evaluate how your ideas align with legal strategies.

9. “I want you to call me every day.”

Regular updates are important, but demanding daily communication can overwhelm your lawyer and distract them from their work. Instead, communicate your desire to stay informed and agree on a reasonable frequency for updates. A schedule helps manage expectations on both sides.

10. “Just tell me what I want to hear.”

It’s crucial to receive honest assessments of your situation, even when the news is tough. Insisting on only positive feedback might inhibit your lawyer’s ability to provide straightforward guidance. Instead, invite counsel by asking for their professional opinion. This opens the door for constructive dialogue.

Understanding what not to say to a lawyer can deepen your professional relationship and foster more effective communication. By avoiding these missteps, you not only respect your lawyer’s expertise but also set the stage for a successful legal outcome. Good communication allows for collaboration and can make all the difference in achieving the best possible results.

The Importance of Clear Communication with Legal Professionals

Effective communication forms the backbone of any successful attorney-client relationship. When navigating legal matters, ensuring that both parties understand each other is crucial. This clarity fosters trust, enhances collaboration, and leads to better outcomes. Below are key aspects that highlight the significance of clear communication with legal professionals.

Understanding Legal Terminology

Legal jargon can often feel daunting for clients. Lawyers frequently use terminology that may not be familiar to a layperson, leading to misunderstandings. To avoid this:

Ask Questions: Don’t hesitate to seek clarification on any term or concept that seems unclear.
Request Simplification: A good lawyer will break down complex ideas into simple, digestible information.
Take Notes: Write down unfamiliar terms and their explanations during meetings to refer back to later.

Setting Clear Expectations

Every legal matter has its own dynamics, and setting expectations from the outset can significantly impact the client-lawyer relationship. This includes:

Timeline: Understanding how long processes typically take can prevent frustration.
Costs: Discussing fees upfront avoids surprises later, paving the way for a transparent financial arrangement.
Involvement: Clients need to know how engaged they should be throughout the legal process, whether it involves gathering evidence or attending hearings.

Maintaining Open Lines of Communication

Keeping communication lines open is vital throughout the legal process. Regular updates and check-ins create a sense of partnership. Here’s how to ensure continuous communication:

Schedule Regular Meetings: Set specific times to review progress and address any concerns.
Use Multiple Channels: Whether it’s email, phone calls, or video conferencing, utilizing various methods ensures that all parties can communicate effectively.
Encourage Feedback: Create a culture where clients feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and concerns about the legal strategy.

Expressing Concerns and Feedback

Clients should feel empowered to voice their opinions, questions, and concerns. This two-way communication can lead to a more productive relationship. Here’s how to effectively express thoughts:

Be Honest: Share any hesitations about the legal strategy candidly.
Inquire About Alternatives: If a suggested approach doesn’t feel right, ask if there are other options available.
Discuss Comfort Levels: Discuss any emotional or psychological apprehensions to help the lawyer adjust their approach accordingly.

Documenting Conversations

Another essential aspect of communication is documentation. Keeping a record of discussions and agreements can mitigate issues down the road. Here are some tips:

Follow-Up Emails: After meetings, send a summary email to recap what was discussed, ensuring that both parties are on the same page.
Save Important Documents: Maintain copies of contracts, agreements, and any relevant correspondence.
Review Regularly: Go over documents periodically to ensure everything remains accurate and reflective of the current situation.

Building Trust Through Transparency

Establishing trust is paramount in the attorney-client relationship. Transparency in communication helps build this trust. To foster transparency:

Be Forthright: A lawyer should provide honest assessments of cases, even if the news isn’t favorable.
Share All Relevant Facts: Clients must be forthright about their circumstances, as withholding information can compromise their case.
Discuss Strategies Openly: Clients should understand the rationale behind legal strategies to feel reassured in their counsel.

Effective communication with legal professionals is a cornerstone of successful legal representation. Clear, open dialogue can facilitate understanding, enhance trust, and lead to more favorable outcomes in legal endeavors. By prioritizing effective communication, clients can ensure they are actively involved and informed throughout their legal journeys.

Understanding Legal Terminology: Speaking Your Lawyer’s Language

When dealing with legal matters, understanding terminology is crucial for effective communication with your lawyer. Knowing the lingo can not only help you feel more confident but also ensures that you and your attorney are on the same page. Here, we delve into key legal terms and concepts that will empower you in your discussions with your lawyer.

One of the primary challenges clients face is the complexity of legal language. Many legal terms are derived from Latin, which can be intimidating for those not accustomed to the jargon. For example, terms like “pro bono” (meaning work undertaken voluntarily and without payment) or “habeas corpus” (a legal action requiring a person under arrest to be brought before a judge) can seem overwhelming. Familiarizing yourself with these terms can ease communication and enhance your understanding of proceedings.

Essential Legal Terminology to Know

Affidavit: A written statement confirmed by oath, used as evidence in court.
Deposition: A legal process where a witness provides sworn evidence, recorded for later use.
Litigation: The process of taking legal action or resolving a dispute in court.
Jurisdiction: The official power to make legal decisions and judgments, often geographically defined.
Discovery: A pre-trial procedure where parties exchange information and gather evidence.
Injunction: A court order requiring a party to do or refrain from doing specific acts.
Negligence: Failure to take proper care in doing something, which leads to damage or injury.

It’s also important to grasp concepts related to the legal process itself. Understanding how cases progress through various stages, from filing a complaint to potential appeals, can provide insight into what to expect. Here are some key stages:

Filing: Initiating a lawsuit by submitting legal documents to the court.
Answer: The defendant’s response to the plaintiff’s complaint, outlining defenses and claims.
Trial: The formal examination of evidence in court to determine the outcome of a case.
Appeal: Seeking a higher court to review and change the decision of a lower court.

Another aspect of legal discussions involves the various types of law that may pertain to your case. These include criminal law, civil law, family law, and corporate law, among others. Each area of law has its unique terminology and procedures:

Criminal Law: Deals with actions against the state or public and encompasses terms such as “felony” and “misdemeanor.”
Civil Law: Involves disputes between individuals or organizations, often centered on rights, contracts, and obligations.
Family Law: Covers legal issues related to family relationships like divorce, child custody, and adoption.
Corporate Law: Focuses on legal practices surrounding businesses, including liabilities and shareholder rights.

One effective way to improve communication with your lawyer is to ask clarifying questions when you come across unfamiliar terminology. For instance, if your lawyer says, “We need to prepare for the discovery phase,” don’t hesitate to ask, “What does that involve?” This helps ensure that you fully grasp the implications of what’s being discussed.

Additionally, consider keeping a glossary of legal terms handy. This can serve as a quick reference guide during your meetings. Over time, you’ll find that it becomes easier to engage in conversations with your lawyer, which can lead to a more productive attorney-client relationship.

Understanding legal terminology is a significant step toward empowering yourself in legal matters. By familiarizing yourself with essential terms, concepts, and stages of the legal process, you facilitate clear communication with your lawyer, enabling better outcomes for your case. Investing the time to learn the language of the law can only benefit you as you navigate your legal journey.

Building a Trusting Relationship with Your Lawyer

Building a trusting relationship with your lawyer is essential for achieving favorable outcomes in legal matters. A solid rapport can make communication more effective and ensure that you feel comfortable discussing sensitive issues. Here are several strategies to enhance your relationship with your legal representative, focusing on transparency, communication, and mutual respect.

First and foremost, open communication is key. Establish a dialogue that encourages honesty from both parties. Here are some points to consider when striving for effective communication:

Share all relevant information: Providing your lawyer with comprehensive details about your case allows them to offer better guidance and representation.
Ask questions: Don’t hesitate to ask about legal terms or strategies. Your lawyer should be willing to clarify anything you find confusing.
Be honest about your expectations: Discuss your goals openly. This helps your lawyer create realistic strategies tailored to your objectives.

Another vital aspect is setting clear boundaries and expectations from the get-go. Clarifying how often you’d like updates and the preferred modes of communication (email, phone calls, etc.) can alleviate any misunderstandings down the line. Consider the following:

Establish a communication schedule: Whether weekly or bi-weekly, regular updates can keep you informed and engaged.
Define working hours: Knowing when your lawyer is available will help manage your expectations for responses.
Discuss billing practices: Understanding how you’re charged — whether hourly or flat rates — can prevent unpleasant surprises when it comes time to settle the bill.

Trust is the foundation of any lawyer-client relationship. Building this trust involves demonstrating reliability and integrity on both sides. Here are some tips to foster mutual trust:

Be punctual: Arriving on time for appointments shows respect for your lawyer’s time and the seriousness of your case.
Follow through with commitments: If your lawyer asks you to provide documents, do so promptly. This reflects your dedication to the process.
Maintain confidentiality: Upholding confidentiality not only protects your interests but also reinforces the trust between you and your lawyer.

It’s also essential to understand your lawyer’s perspective. Legal professionals often juggle multiple cases, tight deadlines, and complex legal regulations. A little empathy goes a long way. Here’s how you can empathize:

Be patient: Recognize that legal processes can be drawn out. Patience can help prevent tension in your relationship.
Acknowledge their expertise: Trust in your lawyer’s knowledge and experience. This can help you feel more confident in their advice.

Moreover, be prepared to face the reality of your situation. Sometimes, your lawyer may have to deliver news you’re not ready to hear, but a clear perspective is vital. Here are practical steps to prepare for these discussions:

Stay grounded: Accept that your lawyer has your best interests at heart, even when delivering unfavorable news.
Focus on solutions: Rather than dwelling on problems, channel your energy into understanding the next steps you need to take.

Another essential element in fostering a trusting relationship is providing feedback. Constructive feedback helps your lawyer gauge how effectively they are meeting your needs. Consider these practices for offering feedback:

Be specific: Instead of saying, “I don’t like this,” explain your concerns so your lawyer can address them directly.
Use positive reinforcement: Acknowledge what your lawyer is doing well, as this encourages continued excellence in their practice.

Mutual respect can elevate the relationship and contribute to a more productive partnership. When both parties show respect for one another’s time, knowledge, and effort, it solidifies a strong foundation for collaboration. Remember, a successful lawyer-client relationship doesn’t just happen; it requires intention and effort from both sides.

Fostering a trusting relationship with your lawyer is crucial for navigating any legal challenges. By focusing on open communication, empathy, reliability, and mutual respect, you can work together toward achieving your legal goals efficiently. Remember that your lawyer is not just an advisor; they are your partner in the legal process.

Navigating Client-Lawyer Expectations: Dos and Don’ts

Navigating the relationship between clients and lawyers can be a complex endeavor, filled with expectations that must be carefully managed. Both parties come to the table with unique needs and perspectives, which can lead to misunderstandings if not addressed appropriately. Here are some essential dos and don’ts to guide both clients and lawyers in this crucial relationship.

Understanding Communication

Effective communication serves as the backbone of the client-lawyer relationship. Clearly expressing thoughts and feelings helps ensure that everyone is on the same page. Here’s what you should keep in mind:

Do keep your lawyer informed: Share all relevant information, no matter how small you might think it is.
Don’t withhold details: Omitting information, even if it seems unfavorable, can hinder your case’s outcome.
Do ask questions: If there’s something you don’t understand, asking for clarification can clear up confusion.
Don’t assume: Never assume your lawyer knows everything about your situation. Be proactive in sharing insights.

Setting Expectations

Before entering any legal agreement, both clients and lawyers must establish clear expectations. Here’s how to navigate this aspect effectively:

Do clarify your goals: Make sure your lawyer understands what you’re hoping to achieve.
Don’t have unrealistic expectations: Legal outcomes are rarely guaranteed, so it’s crucial to be realistic about what your case may yield.
Do discuss timelines: Knowing how long the process typically takes helps to manage your impatience and planning.
Don’t pressure for immediate results: Understand that thorough work takes time, and rushing can compromise quality.

Financial Considerations

Discussing legal fees and costs should not be a taboo subject. Transparency can lead to a more harmonious collaboration.

Do talk about fees upfront: Knowing how billing works — from hourly rates to flat fees — can prevent misunderstandings later on.
Don’t avoid cost discussions: Never shy away from discussing financial details; it’s essential for both parties to stay informed.
Do keep track of the expenses: Regularly reviewing costs can help you stay within budget and avoid surprises.
Don’t forget about additional costs: Be aware of potential extra expenses like filing and court fees so you can budget accordingly.

Respecting Boundaries

Respecting each other’s time and boundaries is vital in maintaining a professional relationship. Here are some boundaries to consider:

Do establish communication preferences: Let your lawyer know how you’d prefer to communicate — via email, phone, or in-person meetings.
Don’t overwhelm your lawyer: Refrain from bombarding them with frequent messages. Trust their expertise to handle your case efficiently.
Do understand their workload: Lawyers may have multiple cases to manage; a little patience can go a long way.
Don’t expect immediate responses: While it’s human to want quick replies, remember that attorneys often juggle many responsibilities.

Building Trust

A strong foundation of trust is key to any successful client-lawyer relationship. Here’s how to build that trust:

Do be honest: Share your concerns openly and trust that your lawyer will guide you with your best interests at heart.
Don’t lie or exaggerate: This can severely damage the trust between you and your lawyer and can affect your case.
Do keep communication lines open: Foster an environment where both parties feel comfortable discussing concerns and updates.
Don’t shy away from feedback: Constructive feedback helps improve the process for future cases.

In navigating the delicate interactions between clients and lawyers, following these dos and don’ts creates a professional environment based on mutual respect and understanding. By doing so, both parties can work together more effectively toward achieving favorable outcomes.

Key Takeaway:
When interacting with a lawyer, understanding what not to say can significantly impact the effectiveness of your legal representation. A common misstep is making blanket statements like, “I just want to settle,” without discussing the specific details of your case. Such remarks can undermine the legal strategy and give a misleading impression of your commitment to pursuing the best outcome. This highlights the importance of clear communication with legal professionals. Honest and detailed disclosures about your situation help your lawyer formulate a stronger case, ensuring both parties are on the same page.
Furthermore, understanding legal terminology and speaking your lawyer’s language is crucial. Avoid phrases that might confuse or mislead. Instead, ask questions to clarify unfamiliar terms. A clear grasp of legal language not only enhances your discussions but also builds confidence in the legal process.
Building a trusting relationship with your lawyer is fundamental. Avoid saying things that could erode this trust, like withholding crucial information or exaggerating facts. Transparency fosters a stronger partnership and paves the way for a more accurate assessment of your case.
Navigating client-lawyer expectations means recognizing the dos and don’ts in your communication. For example, don’t expect immediate answers outside of office hours or demand your lawyer to drop other clients for your case. Respect for their time will facilitate a more productive working relationship. Keeping expectations realistic and understanding the legal process will ultimately serve you better.
The key takeaway is to maintain open, honest, and respectful communication with your lawyer. Avoid vague statements, embrace clear legal terminology, foster trust, and understand the boundaries of the client-lawyer relationship. By doing so, you not only enhance your legal experience but also pave the way for a favorable outcome in your legal matters.

Conclusion

Navigating the legal landscape requires a nuanced understanding of your interactions with legal professionals. A significant part of this journey involves recognizing what not to say to a lawyer. Missteps can not only lead to misunderstandings but may also jeopardize your case. It is vital to avoid vague language or the urge to express frustration without clear context. Phrases like, “I don’t think this is a big deal” can be particularly detrimental as they downplay the seriousness of legal situations that may require immediate attention. Instead, you want to articulate concerns clearly and accurately, which will foster a more productive dialogue between you and your lawyer.

Effective communication lays the foundation for a strong client-lawyer relationship. Clear and open dialogue can facilitate a better understanding of your case’s intricacies, allowing your lawyer to craft the best strategy on your behalf. One crucial aspect of this communication is asking specific questions and expressing your thoughts in a manner that demonstrates respect for their expertise. Rather than using phrases that might undermine their knowledge, such as, “I read this online, and I think it’s wrong,” consider framing your inquiries about any legal terminology or principles in a way that encourages explanation and discussion. This approach not only demonstrates your willingness to learn but also reinforces your lawyer’s role as a trusted advisor.

Speaking your lawyer’s language is another key element in effective attorney-client communication. Understanding legal terminology can significantly enhance your interactions. When you familiarize yourself with the terms relevant to your case, you reduce the chances of misinterpretations and miscommunications. Avoid saying things like, “I don’t really care about the details,” as this perspective may lead to crucial aspects being overlooked. Instead, taking the time to learn about relevant legal jargon can empower you to engage meaningfully in discussions and decisions.

Building a trusting relationship with your lawyer cannot be overstated. Trust is the bedrock of any successful client-lawyer interaction. Comments that question a lawyer’s competence can create an atmosphere of hostility and skepticism. Saying something like, “Are you sure you can handle this?” can undermine trust and may inhibit your lawyer’s willingness to share essential information about your case. Encouragement and trustworthiness can bring out the best in your lawyer, so try to express confidence in their abilities while remaining open about your concerns.

As any seasoned lawyer like Jeremy Eveland would confirm, a clear understanding of client-lawyer expectations is quintessential to smooth legal navigation. Misunderstandings often arise from ambiguous expectations or last-minute changes in a case. Phrases such as, “I thought you were going to handle it” can lead to conflict and frustration. Instead, ensure you articulate what you need regarding timelines, deliverables, and specific next steps throughout the process. This clarity helps your lawyer better manage your case while aligning with your expectations to avoid any unpleasant surprises.

Recognizing the importance of balancing expectations with realistic timelines and results is essential. Avoid saying, “I want this resolved by the end of the week,” unless you fully understand how feasible that is given the complexities of your case. Such demands can place undue pressure on your lawyer and may result in a compromise on the quality of service you receive. Instead, express your needs while allowing your lawyer to navigate the intricacies of the legal system.

In the end, maintaining open lines of communication, comprehending legal jargon, nurturing trust, and aligning expectations serve as vital components in successfully navigating your legal journey. The stakes are high, and every conversation counts. By being mindful of what not to say to a lawyer, you can enhance the efficiency and effectiveness of your collaboration, ensuring that both you and your legal professional are aligned in pursuit of successful outcomes. Your insights, questions, and respect for the legal process can significantly influence how your case progresses, creating a partnership that is rooted in trust and clear communication. As you engage with your lawyer, remember that a positive relationship can pave the way for favorable results.